How to Invite Burned Out People to Parties

Photo by 2 Bro’s Media on Unsplash

Burnout is very real and very frustrating. It can keep us feeling left out and as though we don’t belong in our social circles because we can’t always participate like everyone else. But we still want our friends to include usin their lives, because the alternative is being left behind and second guessed.

I want to be there. But sometimes I can’t.

Including your burned out spoonie friends in your social plans means keeping the space open for them but not expecting them to arrive on time, stay long, or come at all. Including chronically ill friends means knowing that scheduled activities, even the most fun and engaging ones, are no match for a pain flare or a day when grief has taken over and I can barely make myself eat something, let alone put on pants.

I love to socialize. It’s an important part of my self care. Quality time is a critical aspect of my love language.

But sometimes quality time is going to mean hanging out in pajamas instead of going to the club.

Here are a few ways you can hold space to honor your friends who deal with burnout:

1. Understand Burnout Isn’t Personal: If someone cancels plans because they are socially burned out, please understand that it’s not you — it’s everything. When someone is at the point of burnout, every…