I ignored friends and acquaintances telling me that something wasn’t right for years. I nearly left my partner once, but he convinced me we could work on our issues and he played the bereaved and ignorant partner — how could I have missed how unhappy you were? My sudden shift came in the form of antidepressants. Without the fog of anxiety (which he steadily fed in the form of “negging” compliments, taking credit for steering me toward my achievements, etc.), I started to stand up for myself and expect better from him. He said my meds changed me and might be the wrong fit. I left. And since then, it’s been nine months of unpacking layer upon layer of the things he took from me. Realizing my favorite band had put out two albums I’d never even heard of. Finally painting again. Writing with authenticity. Thank you for writing this!

Prone to sudden bursts of encouragement. They/them. Queer, autistic author of bit.ly/GaslightingMillennials

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